Solitary.

Tyler bought me Burger King and now I'm sooo damn full. Sitting in front of the computer with a full stomach, doesn't make me feel so healthy! I wish I was in swim again sometimes.. Mmm, I can't believe it's already mid may, and summer is around the corner. Next month is half of 2010 right?!

Time goes by so fast. And I'm sitting here on a Friday night thinking about what has happened these past beginning of 2010, leading back to 2009. And I feel hollow and heavy at the same time. I've made it this far with my mentality, but I know that there's a long way ahead of me and more to learn. I've got so much going on for me, school, extra classes, even with family and friends, but at the end of day..I just feel alone. Alone in my own journey, my paths, my dreams. I feel as though I'm always in a different page than everyone else. I might be happy, content, complacent, but I feel small and trifling. Don't get me wrong, I do feel grateful. I am grateful to the handful of people who tried to keep up with me. But it's hard to let people past the surface. It's hard to trust people with my thoughts and feelings. I feel myself slowly falling into these conflicting emotions, and I really don't feel like doing anything about it. I just want to continue falling until I reach the bottom, until I am on hard ground. And from there, I'll just sit and wait until I find secured bliss again.